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Amelia was thirteen when her divorced parents sat down across her mom’s kitchen table, asked her to join them, and, after exchanging a glance that immediately made her nerves stand on edge, said the following words:

“Sex isn’t a bad thing. In fact —” another glance — “it can be quite good, with the right person.”

AND THEN AMELIA DIED.

Really, though, the sex talk? The birds, the bees? For this girl, it came too late. Not too-late too late, mind you, she’d not actually HAD sex (though some of her peers had, and she’d meet people later who’d had it by thirteen, too), but she KNEW ABOUT sex. Like, she knew how it worked, and why people did it, and for heavens’ sake, she didn’t need to learn about it from her PARENTS. Ew. She told them as much, and they, grateful and relieved, hushed up about it.

Alfie, the thirteen-year-old new father in Britain (though, eesh, stories now suggest he’s only one of a number of possible fathers), had apparently not had the uncomfortable discussion with his parents:

It is certainly evidence that one little boy did not know very much at all about sex. His father has told reporters that while the two children were regularly allowed to share a bed, he had not yet gotten around to talking to his son about where babies come from.

He will soon, he promised. A little late, in this case, but still a good idea.

A little late? A LITTLE LATE? Yeah, it was late for Amelia, whose cousin Sarah had explained it all to her (in shrieks and giggles, yes, but still) when she was nine, but she at least didn’t have a KID OF HER OWN when her parents exchanged that revoltingly lovey glance across the table.

Alfie’s parents failed their kid. Will you fail yours?